The Cincinnati Michael Jackson Society of Awesomeness

Cincinnati Observatory

My head is still abuzz with amazement at what I heard and saw and the Cincinnati Observatory Friday night. The cloud cover made for lousy star-gazing, but the history of Cincinnati had me and John Quincy Adams grabbing our crotches Michael Jackson-style, soaring through the cosmos with pride.

CINCINNATI, I LOVE YOU. HO!!!!!!

The history that I heard is so crotch-grippingly-sweet that I became enraptured by the key players and the badassness of those early Cincinnatians. Ormsby Mitchel, John Quincy Adams, Nicholas Longworth-- you are bigger than the Big Red Machine. What their efforts must have meant in those days!!

I'm not sure we even know how to think along such heroic lines any more. Where could we draw the parallel between what got done in 1842 Cincinnati and what its equivalent would be in today's terms?

A future parallel...
In 2018, Cincinnati changes the name of its Hyde Park neighborhood to Billclintopia. Because that would happen easily, right? If you know Hyde Park, then you know that would be paramount to calling 2012 Georgia Obamaland. How could an ex-president possibly, and so convincingly, transcend partisan politics to get some REAL QUALITY LEGACY shit done that everybody likes and needs?

In his last public appearance, Clinton lauds the Cincinnatians gathered at the Wasson Way Amphitheater for helping him manifest his lifelong dream. He calls it "one of his finest life achievements", after spending two terms as president, failing to ignite Congress to sieze the greatest humanitarian opportunity a nation ever had. America couldn't do it, but Cincinnati did. This is basically what John Quincy Adams did with our help, led my Ormsby Mitchel-- the Bill Nye/Michael Jackson of his time.

A recent historical parallel...
In 1993, after spending $2 billion on construction and planning, Congress pulled the plug on the Superconducting Super Collidor in Texas, that would have been five times more powerful than the now world-famous CERN particle accelerator in Europe. Can you imagine if Cincinnati would have been there to say, "You know what-- screw you Congress, we want the world's most cutting edge science and we want our citizens to not only own it, but use it-- men, women, and children."

...Except this parallel would fall short on many levels:
1) as bitchin' as a particle accelerator is, it's not as universally FUN for people of all ages as the Observatory;
2) its scientific contributions aren't as immediately applicable to ALL facets of daily life and safety (time keeping and weather predicting);
3) it would have to have been built by donated time and materials from locals who believe in the mission and act out their commitment to the values of the Republic;
4) its architectural beauty would have to be enduring and worthy of hosting a wedding 150 years later (as it hosted mine);
5) and perhaps most importantly, it would have to meet humanity's most threatening identity crisis.

I'd just like to give a shout out to the volunteers of the Observatory. They number over 100 strong. They are geeky and proud and they just want to share the passion for planets. Our host for the evening was Leo, who remained true to the spririt of Omsby Mitchel, the Observatory's founder. The Observatory's website had this to say of the man whose passion made it all happen:

Ormsby Mitchel

Mitchel's enthusiasm and clarity impressed his audiences. As one person who heard him has said: "In New York the music hall is thronged night after night to hear his impassioned eloquence poured in an unbroken flow of 'thoughts that breathe and words that burn' on the excited thousands. A sublimer spectacle in lecturing was never seen. The theme, the orator, the intellectual audiences, the rapt attention, the almost painful intensity of feeling, all crown him the prince of lecturers." The great expansion of interest in astronomy, and the proliferation of observatories during the next few years owes a great deal to the efforts of Mitchel, who has sometimes been called "The Father of American Astronomy.